A Lesson in Listening and Grace

This is our Mia. I love this little girl so much. Over a year ago,probably closer to 2 years ago, we started the super fun job of potty training. As first time parents we had no idea what to expect. Getting her to pee in the potty came pretty quickly, but going "number 2" did not come as easily. Every time she had to poop, she would run and hide. We decided to wait, thinking "she'll do it when she's ready". Age 3 rolls around, and we try again.... same results. We tried everything we could think of from prizes, other rewards, disciplining her.... everything. We made a chart with prizes every time she went in the potty, and then after she got 5 stars, Hershey Park! even a Dog! I mean we tried it all.

When age 4 rolled around, and she still was pooping in her pants, we started getting frustrated, even angry at times. "Mia, you know when you have to poop because you run and hide! Just sit on the potty!" We were at our wits end.

Finally we were at the point where Stephanie said, "OK, you pooped in your pants again, just sit in it... we're not changing you." Now I never claim to hear God speak to me.... in fact, I have so many voices going in my head from day to day, I don't know who's who. It's true. But as we both sat there, frustrated and angry with her, refusing to change her poopy pants again, God spoke to me. "How many times each day do you mess up? And each time, I forgive you. Each and every time, even though you slip up in the same areas every single day." He also said, "Just stop trying to fix it yourself, stop with all the promises of rewards, etc. I want you to just let Me handle it. Every morning you need to pray for Mia. Pray for her stomach, pray for her day. Just pray, and I will take care of it."

So we did it. We stopped getting mad, though it was still frustrating, and we prayed over Mia every morning. A few days went by, maybe even a week, with the same results of poopy pants, but we kept praying. And then..... One day she just started going and sitting on the potty and pooping in the potty! I think she had one or 2 accidents in the first couple of days, but now she's pooping in the potty all the time!

Lessons learned.... quit trying to do things on your own! When times are tough, God is there! He wants to help you, He wants you to let him take care of things! Also, think about how many times we mess up each day, often in the same areas. God forgives us each and every time.... he picks us back up when we fall! How awesome is that!? He wants us to remember that and extend that grace to people and areas in our lives.

Update: Philly

So this past Wednesday, I went back to the Jefferson Headache Center in Philadelphia. It felt good to go back, since they deal specifically with headaches.

After talking to the doctors, and going over everything that's gone on since my last visit, they told me that they pretty much have two options left.

The first option is Botox injections. This option has been brought up before by many of my doctors, both here in PA and in Virginia, but because insurance didn't cover the medicine, I was unable to try the botox. I think the last time they checked, it was about $1500 a shot. Now however, the FDA has finally approved botox for chronic migraine treatment. So JHC is now in the process of seeing how much (if any) of the cost my insurance will cover. They feel that it shouldn't be a problem, since I meet all of the criteria, and other patients there with the same insurance are getting their's covered.

The next, and pretty much final option, if all else fails is what they call an occipital nerve stimulator. I think I've talked about this in the past, but they would surgically install a lead along my occipital nerve, and it would be connected by wires to a little box that would hang on my side. When I started getting a headache, I would push a button and it would send a little electric shock to my occipital nerve and stop the headache. The procedure is approved in Europe, but not covered here as of yet. They are however having great success with it in patients that have had it done. It's a very expensive procedure of course, which is why I haven't had it done, nor will be able to have it done anytime soon, unless insurances decide to start paying for it.

So anyways, that's about it.... right now I'm just waiting to hear back about how much my insurance will cover on the Botox. My next appointment, which will be when I get the injections is December 19th. Until then I'm pretty much just hanging in there, doing what I can to deal with the pain.

Going back to Philly

For those that still check in on here for updates, I thought I'd fill ya in. As you may or may not remember, I stopped going to the Jefferson Headache Center sometime last year. Lack of finances to make the trip from VA to Philly, and also changes in insurance kept me from keeping up with my doctors there. I tried several other doctors in VA, from pain management to neurologists with not much luck at all.

Now since we're living in PA, and Stephanie has much better insurance through Hershey Medical Center, I'm going to be able to go back to JHC in Philadelphia. The doctor I was seeing is no longer there, but they were able to get me in to see another doctor this coming Wednesday, Oct. 19th. I was worried that I'd have to start all over from the beginning since it had been a while since I'd been there, but they said it wouldn't be a problem. I'm hoping now that Botox has been FDA approved for headache treatment, and they probably have some newer techniques as well, that we can finally get these things under control.

It's frustrating to not be able to plan things, cancel plans you've already made, miss small groups, and miss out on my family because of being in pain. I never know when or how long the headache is gonna hit. So tough.... here's to praying for relief!